Friday, April 18, 2014

Laywer's Perspective on First Court Case

So I started my first law case today. I was to defend a client in a seemingly mindless act of violence. He shot at a man in a field at 300 yards, a head shot. He died before his smoking hat even passively floated to the ground.

The plaintiff's side made a lot of good, extensive arguments. It was my case to lose.

When it was my turn to speak I merely called the lead investigator to the stand and unsheathed a blow-up print of a hat in a grassy field next to a cold, blue-ish hand and a yellow marker with a number on it.

I Snapchatted this pic when the judge wasn't looking

I asked the man, in congenial fashion, what type of hat was in the photograph.

The veteran officer began to mumble, as if a lump was in his throat. Stuttering, he eventually whimpered the words, "A fedora."

An uproar of yammering and whispers ignited amongst the jurors. "No further questions," I added.

What subsequently followed was the shortest deliberation in Illinois law history. Without even leaving their seats, my client received a verdict of "Not guilty."

The crowd erupted in a boisterous applause. The standing ovation led to me being hoisted and passed amongst the audience until reaching the courthouse steps where the mayor awaited, handing me a freshly minted key to the city.

I must say I am pretty proud of myself.

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