Friday, April 3, 2009

Save the best for first

Screw that 'save the best for last' mentality. It's for the birds. Smart people save the worst for last by way of their better nature. Only dweebs get ideas such as, "lets do our 10-page essay now so we can party all weekend!" before realizing they're alone in the room and their weekend consists of video games, nachos and self-pity. Even if subconsciously, most people realize that if an alien invasion were to hit Earth on Sunday, they'd be better off screwing, drinking, and burning crosses on lawns during Saturday.

It's not human nature. There's no time to live a life dictated by anything but whim. Watch the good movie before the bad one. Start at the end of the book if it looks boring. Drunkenly set fire to a neighboring city on Sunday and do your report hungover before class on Monday, as that time's wasted for you by default. Now go climb a mountain, eat a new kind of reptile meat, rent an extravagant escort, write a book and list this post as your inspiration.


  1. Makes perfect sense. I'm going to shit on the bosses desk, shoot smack, fuck a hot bitch, and light the neighbor's house on fire. Maybe I'll light the boss on fire, shit on a hot bitch, and fuck the neighbor's house. I'm still shooting some smack. Restraint be damned!