Friday, April 3, 2009

Lesbians for peace

Our society is so timid towards sexuality the most one could aspire to is paying for overpriced drinks at a club with loud, bad music and poor lighting to see people grind through flimsy clothing, and at best, participate in this vile ritual.

Where are the orgies? I want to see scenes straight out of Eyes Wide Shut happening at a local club next to a Payless ShoeSource. I'm talking saving some time and a trip getting new velcro pleather shoes before going with my friend Todd to a real club. No cameras. Cloaks are optional. You put on a Phantom of the Opera mask and lounge with your crew comprising yourself, a hooker, a midget, a drunk and a token gay. You sip strange green mixed drinks and make snide remarks about technique. Join in at your discretion.

Dogs can piss in public but humans can't under the guise of civility. We can't make love to our spouse while waiting in line for an ATM. We cannot join the Mile High Club while ordering drinks from a flight attendant. Walking down the street naked as the day you were born is sure to get you a police record. The injustice and lunacy of modern life is beyond simple and natural harmony.

If sexual freedom is to be expressed, where are the real protests? Where's the queer Rosa Parks? A gay parade is nothing more than an obnoxious, meaningless excuse to party like Cinco De Mayo. We need liberty without limits. We aren't free until lesbians gather at grassy fields near Millennium Park in Chicago and perform scissor sex and cunnilingus in the form of a peace sign. I want Fox News to post the aerial view from Chopper 9 on their morning show. That's an event I would like to see.


  1. you are not funny or intelligent.. just saying. fucking die please.

  2. Awwwww shit, looks like we found a hommaseckshul and it's all bent outta shape. You are both funny and intelligent. Keep up the good work WG. Rosa Parks was queer as a wheelbarrow full of dicks.